Oooh I think I have it! Wait, no.. No, I definitely do not have it

Hbf and I found ourselves in Mui Ne, a beach city that is world famous for its kite surfing. Hbf has wanted to try it since he laid eyes on the sport, but it was sort of a new thought for me. I figured I would give it a shot since we were in the right place. My instructor was named Hi and was tiny vietnamese man who had no qualms about yelling at me when I did something wrong.

Day 1

For the first 30 minutes Hi had me practice with a trainer kite, aka a normal kite, so I could figure out how to control it. I've flown a kite maybe once in my life (sad, I know) but I thought I had the hang of it when the time was up. Next, it was time to move onto the kite that is actually used for kite surfing. That kite was 5 x bigger and had to be inflated. The wind was very strong, so Hi thought it best for me to sit down and learn so I didn't blow off the beach when I messed up. Even sitting, Hi held onto my harness in the back and the kite still picked me up during some of the moves. I started to get a little nervous after getting a feel for the power that the kite had. In the beginning, I constantly did the wrong thing and Hi would yell, 'You have to control the kite!' and then grab it from me before it yanked me out to sea. 90 minutes later, I had gotten a pretty good grasp on the controls and Hi only yelled at my about every 5 minutes. Progress. Hbf had a different instructor. While I was still on the beach with my kite, he had made it to the next step which was flying the kite in the water. I tried not to take it hard that he was better than me already, but it burned a bit. Hi decided that tomorrow would be better for me in the water because the wind was too strong in the afternoon. Fine by me.

Day 2

I actually got to enter the water, but no board yet. The waves were huge, and Hi controlled the kite while we attempted to make it past the huge surf. Waves crashed right on our heads, over and over. I clung desperately to Hi, Hi held on to the kite, and the kite dragged us out past the vicious waves. I was tempted to call it a day when I had drank about a gallon of salt water, but it had only been 10 minutes. The lesson must go on. Hi taught me how to body drag, which means that you let the kite drag you all around the ocean. This is in case you lose your board, you know how to retrieve it. He demonstrated, and then I did it with him hanging on to me. It went well, at first. Then, all of a sudden, a huge gust of wind grabbed my kite, and me along with it. Hi tried to hold on, but the kite yanked me out of the water and threw me like 5 feet. I heard Hi yell from behind me, 'You have to control the kite!' Yeah, yeah.. I finally got to the point where I could be in the water by myself, controlling the kite and not crashing it very often. I was pretty proud of myself, until I saw Hbf. He was already trying to get up on the board. *sigh*

Day 3

I actually get to try with the board today, but not by myself. Hi is with me, hanging on, which is makes it really tough to stay up for longer than 3 seconds. Each time I get up though, and I'm exstatic for those 3 seconds, before I fall and Hi yells 'You need to control the kite!'. I'm just getting semi-comfortable on my good side, when Hi tells me I need to work on my other side. So, I try the other side and the kite yanks me hard out of the water and then promptly crashes. Hard. 'You need to control the kite!' and then, 'You broke the kite'. Sure enough, I look over at the kite and it is a sad little deflated heap, rolling in the ocean waves. Apparently, breaking a kite ends the lesson. But a new lesson began called 'how to swim back to the shore with a broken kite and a kite board.' Basically that lesson involved me using the board as a flotation device while Hi dealt with the deflated kite. Even so, it took me about 20 minutes of hard swimming to make it back to shore. Hi made it back shortly after me, and gave me the good news that the kite didn't have a tear, the vent just popped open. Good, I won't have to pay $1000 after all. Hi told me that I probably needed more lessons (shocking!), but I was pretty pooped and we were leaving the next day. Oh well...

All in all, I had a good time. I will have another chance at kite boarding in the Philippines, if I want it. I haven't decided yet..

Vietnam at Christmas

It's been 3 months now traveling, and the new year is fast approaching. Usually during this time, I'd be home with the fam, soaking up the holiday spirit and eating sugar cookie dough. Mmm.. cookie dough. This is the first Christmas where I won't be home in Oregon, but understandably, no one there really feels sorry for me. My madre tells me about the freezing cold weather in the burrito, but I'm sweating in the non-air conditioned internet cafe at the beach. I semi-wish there was a way to make it home for the holidays, but I knew when we started this trip, I wouldn't be making it home. Maybe it's time to cut the apron strings anyways. Naaah.. Spending the holidays with family is what it's all about. Hopefully there won't be too many years where I am absent, but at least the first time that it has happened, I'm in paradise. Did I mention Vietnam is awesome?

We went to a water park in Saigon, which was amazing. We were severely punished by multiple water slides, but that just added to the fun (don't ask me how.. it just does). Now, we're at a beach called Mui Ne, the wind surfing capital of the world (or, that's what it seems like). We are taking lessons, and of course, Hbf has picked it up quicker than me. He actually made it into the water today, where as I wrestled the kite for 2 hours and then called it a day. Maybe tomorrow I'll actually get to go in the water and have the kite drag me around. Our room here is sweet and comes with a nice balcony that over looks the ocean. I couldn't ask for much more.

The food in Vietnam is.. well it's better than Cambodia, but worse than Thailand. I also think my standards have lowered considerably, so I hope that gives you a good idea of what I am eating. There are days when I'm really happy to eat, and days when I dread it. It all depends on my mood, oddly, and what sounds good at the moment. Lately, I've been craving milk and cereal. I had a brief taste of good milk in Cambodia, and I think it has unleashed my obsession with milk again. I went through withdrawl of milk while we were in Asia, but I was pretty resigned to the fact that I wouldn't get milk for 6 months. I'm very picky about my milk and I wasn't about to drink any warm, powdered, or otherwise different milk from what I am used to in the States. So, when I briefly tried it in Thailand and it tasted very different, I had given up on having it until I got back. At a grocery store in Cambodia, I spotted a box of Honey Bunches of Oats, the best cereal ever made! I was so happy, I didn't a dance right there and really considered buying 5 boxes. Hbf sternly insisted I only get one, and he also convinced me to try some more milk. I was very skeptical, but once that sweet, sweet nectar touched my tongue, I wanted more. I think I drank the carton in about 30 seconds. Since then, I have been on the look out for more milk, but to no avail. Water and juice is such a poor substitute for ice cold milk and the withdrawl symptoms are rearing their ugly head. Moodiness, restlessness, spontaneous shopping for milk.. I have all of them. I know I'll survive, but I want some dang milk!

A smattering of short stories

Mosquitoes
Hbf and I hunkered down in our bus seats, ready to endure a 8+ hour ride through the flatlands of Cambodia on roads that aren't really paved yet.. We got our books out to entertain ourselves for the morning. About an hour goes by when I started noticing mosquitoes buzzing around us. I haaaaate mosquitoes and have personally waged war against them, so I pointed out their existence to Hbf. He followed it with his hand, ready to beat it down, but it promptly disappeared and he shrugged and went back to reading. I'm semi-unhinged by now because I know the mosquito wanted my blood and no one elses, and I can't rest until it's dead. I kept my eyes peeled for any movement and I was soon rewarded with a glimpse of one in the curtains. It made the mistake of coming within striking distance and I clapped my hands around it. One down.. But it soon became apparent that he had friends. Hbf and I went on the offensive, him smashing them against the window, and me smushing them between my hands. We had at least 10 bodies between us when we were finished and we celebrated heartily. It wasn't until we got off the bus that we noticed all the bites on our feet. I guess they got one last buffet before they died.

Food?
We were told by our welcome host, self proclaimed Mr. Lonely, that Cambodians eat everything. I can bear witness that Mr. Lonely is no liar. Hbf and I were on our 3 day, 2 night trek with our guide, Mac and a forest ranger. Lunch on the first day consisted of rice, vegetables and beef. Ok so far.. But Mac went fishing and found himself a small crab. He seemed very excited, but I wasn't sure why. How much meat can you get out of a crab the size of a walnut, anyways? He threw it in the fire for about 30 seconds and then proceeded to pop it in his mouth. The Whole Thing. He crunched on the shell and laughed at the expression on my face, which I'm sure was pure horror. He even said it was very tasty. I doubt that.. That night, Hbf and Mac went fishing in the dark. They came back with a little frog, another crab and some craw daddies. I think Hbf had wanted a snake but they came back empty handed, thank goodness. Mac threw their spoils into the fire for a bit, then just started eating all of them in one bite. Well, except for the frog.. Mac and the ranger ripped it apart to share it. I was screaming the whole time and they just laughed and laughed.. And crunched on their 'food'.

The Drunken Village
Day 2 of our trek, and we found ourselves in a minority village. Apparently it was happy hour because everyone was drinking their homemade rice wine in groups of 10 or so. It actually looked like happy hour had started 2 hours ago, by the way they slurred and stumbled. Who's watching the kids? Darkness came, and Hbf and I settled into our bamboo bed to watch an episode on Lost on the iPod (I know, we're really roughing it). Suddenly, in stumbles a man and starts banging a rock against a metal bowl reeeeeally loudly. We were trying to get him to stop, but of course he doesn't speak english, and I don't speak drunken Khmer, so he kept right on for about a minute or so and then stumbled out again. Weird. 20 minutes later, he was back again with a buddy and wanted to bang the gong again. We endured it without saying anything this time and we just hoped that he leaves after he's done playing. But he doesn't. And more people joined him. Hbf and I looked anxiously at each other because we had no idea what was going on. The village people pretty much ignored us and our guide is nowhere to be found. Slowly, people started trickling in and I was feeling a little nervous. All sorts of scenarios ran through my head, especially a vivid one where we were brought forth as some sort of cannibalistic sacrifice. Turns out they were just having a town meeting. Haha.

Disappointed
Our last day on the trek and I was so close to a shower I could taste it. After a particularly difficult climb, Mac decided to give us a rest. Hbf and I took seats on our back packs and watched as Mac tried to tear down a vine from a tree. As he was tugging, he tried to explain the reason he wanted it, which never really became clear to me. It involved women, fertility, and birth, but that was all I understood. All of a sudden, Mac started hacking at the tree that the vine was attached to. Hbf tells him to stop, and I tell Mac that maybe he shouldn't be cutting down trees. He just smiled and kept chopping. Hbf and I both got up and insisted that he stop cutting the tree down, but it was too late. A moment later it tumbled to the ground and Mac got his vine. I was pretty upset, seeing as cutting down trees has always been a big no-no in any forest. Hbf told Mac that he really shouldn't cut down trees in front of tourists because it will probably offend them. We left the tree, and Mac's tip dropped considerably. Hopefully he learned his lesson.

Holes
We arrived in Phnom Penh and decided to head to the lakeside area to stay. We had read that it was where the backpackers were, so we figured we could find a semi-cheap room to stay while we waited for our Vietnam visas. We had to go to 3 places just to find a room with hot water and A/C. When we finally found the room, it was pretty much the crappiest room we had seen, but it met all of our criteria, so we decided to spend one night there. The hotel itself was a mess of hodge-podge construction, with gaps everywhere and walls made of the thinnest ply-wood. El Dub would definitely say it would never pass a building inspection. As we were getting into bed, Hbf noticed that he could see a hole in our floor and we laughed about it. I got into bed and Hbf plopped down right beside me. As he sat, the bed fell through the floor on one corner, the corner where the hole was that Hbf had found. We heard people exclaiming in surprise below us and we hurredly got the bed out of the hole. Since there was a hole already there, we figured we wouldn't be charged for any damages. The next morning, we told the manager about the hole in the floor and his reply was, "yeah, yeah, hole." Ok then, if it's cool with you it's cool with me.

It's a holiday in Cambodia!

Ohhh Cambodia, how I love thee. We made it Siem Reap without much of a todo, which was such a pleasant surprise. From what we had read, there were tons of scams waiting for us at the border and it all depended on how big of suckers we were. We showed them. We sucked so little that we got them to pay us (not really). Siem Reap is home to Angkor Wat. Angkor what, you ask? Angkor What is actually a bar in Siem Reap, but Angkor Wat is temples, temples and more temples. My max quota for looking at temples is about an hour, but I decided to suck it up and spend the whole day with Hbf seeing the big ones. They are one of the wonders of the world, after all.. They didn't disappoint, either. We had a lovely day and I surpassed my quota 10 times over (I survived).

We were able to meet up with a college friend of mine that has moved to Cambodia for a year to work for a non-profit organization. I hadn't seen him for a couple of years so it was nice to see a familiar face and catch up. What are the odds that someone you know is in Cambodia at the same time as yourself? Pretty cool.

Our next adventure took us to Banlung, with a stopover in Kratie. Kratie is home to some freshwater dolphins and we decided to take a tuk-tuk (a motorcycle with a trailer in the back that has seats for 2-4 people) out to the river to investigate. We ended up sharing a boat with some belgium girls and hunted dolphins for about an hour. No one spoke above a whisper for all that time.. I think we didn't want to scare the dolphins away. It worked though, and we saw no less than 20 appearances by our freshwater friends. Our boat had floated down the river quite aways, and the captain tried in vain to get the motor started. He rowed us to the bank and proceeded to change the spark plugs, siphon out gas with a straw, choke on the gas a little bit, and who knows what else. After about 20 minutes, he got it rolling again and we were motored back to the correct shore. We had a bus to catch in an hour and a half, and it was a 30 minute ride back to town so we hurried and got on our tuk-tuk. 10 minutes later, we have a flat tire.
Our tuk-tuk driver did a little off-roading at the beginning of our trip that I think he quite regretted at that moment. We stopped at a local gas station (someone's house that sells gas) and got the tire fixed. There was even a little puppy for me to play with! We made it back with time to spare and were shortly on our way to Banlung.

I have to say, I am enjoying cambodian food. They have delicious baguettes everywhere and you can get little slices of laughing cow cheese. It's breakfast for like a dollar, sometimes less, depending on where you get your bread. Also, I have had some authentic cambodian food (I'm not lying!) and I liked the flavors. We had something they called BBQ mountain, where they had marinated beef and mixed it with egg, then cooked it right in front of us. I also had something they call luk lak, which is marinated meat over vegetables with rice. It has a very nice flavor. I know! It's crazy!

Puppies!

I found a local animal shelter in Koh Samui to volunteer at for a day since it is something I have wanted to do on this trip. I went to the shelter's smaller location, aka the owner's house, which turned out to be a swedish couple. This was surprising because foreigners are not allowed to work in Thailand. I asked how they opened the shelter, and they said since they are non-profit, and are giving free vet services to all the animals on the island, the police look the other way. They employ all thai people though and foreigners can only volunteer. The house itself was filled with cats and smaller dogs, which they said we either blind or couldn't make it at the bigger location. Their yard was filled with diseased dogs, most looked they had severe cases of mange and many were missing limbs. These dogs were strays from around the area that locals had brought in because they didn't want to look at them anymore. Their mission isn't to necessarily get these dogs adopted (this would be near impossible since dogs aren't really valued in Thailand). They just try to give the dogs medicine and vaccines, along with neutering them to control the population. Once they are deemed healthy they are released back out to the streets. It's kind of sad, but they are doing the best they can, and they give all the medicine for free (who would pay anyways?).

I hopped in the minivan with some of the workers, all male, and we drove to the bigger location on the other side of the island. Some of the workers spoke very broken english, but they immediately pointed me to the puppy house. I couldn't argue with that.. There were 5 rooms with litters of puppies, and a room full of individual cages to house sick puppies that were dropped off at their door. They were almost all full. Some of the puppies were so young that they hadn't even opened their eyes yet. Since they leave the puppies in there the whole day, they have no choice to poo and pee in those rooms. The first item on the agenda was to clean out the rooms. They gave me a hose, and scrub brush with a long handle, bleach and a squeegie and set me to work. Cleaning those rooms took up most of the morning. After that, I watched one of the workers examine the sick puppies in their cages and tried to give them some love too.

We went to lunch at an authentic Thai hole-in-the-wall (or rather, shack on the side of the road) restaurant and they ordered me what looked and tasted like top ramen. We sat silent since none of them could speak very good english and I only know about 2 words in Thai.

After lunch, I ventured to the cat house which housed at least 80 cats and had an inside and outside. I cleaned their beds and swept the floor and then sat down to snuggle with some of the cats. It seemed as though the cats yearned for love too since I had a bunch rubbing themselves against me and trying to get me to pet them.

Besides the puppy and cat houses, there were 10 sections that the shelter was split into. Each section had about 30 dogs which seemed to be in various stages of recovery. About 90% looked to have mange, but were getting help. Dogfights broke out maybe every 20 minutes, but there were always workers there to quickly break it up. Usually a yell would stop them in their tracks, sometimes there needed to be more intervention. There were also other volunteers giving baths to the dogs, but some dogs just didn't want to get in the bath water.. One volunteer was bit and it drew blood. He seemed to be ok but they didn't end up bathing that particular dog.

After that, it was about time to go. The workers all piled in the car and we headed back to the house so I could meet Hbf. On the way home, they stopped for some whiskey and let it flow in the car.. So much so that they made a second stop to buy more whiskey since they had ran through a bottle so quickly. Once the drinks were flowing (I did not partake, of course) the boys started trying to talk to me. They knew a surprising amount of english, and they asked me all sorts of questions about USA. They also started asking me out and asking me to marry them. I told them Hbf would hurt them and that seemed to settle things. It was all good fun and we laughed together the whole time.

It was a really good experience, but definitely so different from the shelters in San Diego. I'm going to keep looking for shelters to volunteer at as we move on to different places because at the end of the day, I felt really good. :)

Happy birthday to me!

I've had some really really great birthdays in my short lifetime. Number 17 was spent with my entire family and some really great friends in Maui. My 21st birthday was on a cruise in the Caribbean with a lobster dinner and pristine beaches on a private island. I celebrated my 24th birthday in Puerto Vallarta by bungee jumping over the ocean with my lil bro. Good stuff. Now, don't think I'm that special (I am that special, though) that my parents would plan all these events because of my birthday.. It just happens that our awesome vacations fall around Thanksgiving, which in turn means my birthday. You will definitely never hear me complain about it.

This year, for my 27th birthday (um.. is it weird that I still feel 19?), I was on an island called Koh Samui, off the eastern coast of Thailand. Wait, it gets better. Hbf upgraded our lodging to a place on the beach, with a pool and air conditioning! It MUST be my birthday.. We enjoyed our delicious breakfast buffet and decided to rent jet skis for 30 minutes. Even if I tried, I couldn't wipe the smile off of my face while riding the jet ski. I felt like I was full throttle the whole time and desperately hanging on with my arms and legs. Sometimes I felt like I would catch 10 feet of air off a wave, but I'm sure I didn't even make it entirely out of the water. I need to get me one of those..

Later, after we had eaten a birthday lunch at what we affectionately called 'cheap street', massages were in order to ease our stiffness from hanging on to the jet skis for dear life. Since there are massage parlors on every corner, we had to have some criterion do decide which one to go to. At every place, the masseuses hang around outside their door and taunt you by saying 'maassaaaaaaage?' The longer they hold their aaaaaaaage, the better you know they are. So, we waited for one of the ladies to really draw it out and we were not disappointed. 'Maassaaaaaaaaaaaage?' Yes, please.

Hbf swears by the Thai massage, so I decided to try it (as opposed to the oil massage). Two little thai girls led us upstairs to beds where we laid on our stomachs next to each other. Hbf immediately closed his eyes and relaxed, but I was a bit tense, not knowing what was going on. For such a lil lady, she had VERY strong hands. But it's not like she only used her hands.. she used her elbows, arms, knees and even her feet. At one point she was standing on the back of my thighs with my calves intertwined with hers, working her elbows in my back. It felt good though.. I had to learn to relax and not fight it. Otherwise I think I would have broken something.. Or rather, she would have broken something of mine. As she wrapped my legs around her and worked on my hips and thighs, I thought (and not for the first time) that maybe I shouldn't have worn a skirt. She has prolly seen a lot worse though, so I didn't let it bother me too much. My eyes were closed most of the time so I didn't get to see what treatment Hbf was getting. At one point both the girls got behind us at the same time and pushed us over to touch our toes, which I haven't done in quite a while. I think a whimper may have escaped my lips, which only made the thai girls giggle. After it was all done, I actually felt pretty good. It was the roughest massage I had ever gotten, but it also may have been one of the best. Happy birthday to me!

Boys are strange

There's a certain tourist 'strip' in Koh Samui called Chaweng Beach. There's shopping, eating, more shopping and more eating. Also, tourist centers on every corner to book any trip you could possibly think of. As Hbf and I wandered the strip on our second night, we heard a reedy, hypnotic tune playing far away, but coming closer. It instantly gave me a visual of the man with a clarinet coaxing the cobra snake out of a wicker basket.. Ya get me? As the music grew nearer, we heard a man announcing a Thai Boxing match for Friday night. It went like this:
Announcer - Tomorrow night! TOMORROW NIGHT! A super fight. The GREATEST fight! Muay Thai Champion. Get to seat earlier. Get to seat EARLIER.

All the while that music was playing.. It worked perfectly on us and we bought our tickets to the match the next day. (We heard that announcement no less than 50 times by the time the match was going to start. They drive the strip all day and all night and even have a boat at the beach drive along and announce the fight all day. You can't get away from it!)

The cab was coming to pick us up at 9 so we decided to get some food right before to make sure we didn't have to buy anything at the ring. When we got back to our hotel at 8:50, the taxi was already there, waiting for us with other people in the car who were also going to the fight. I told Hbf to go grab our receipt from our room so we could turn it in for tickets at the stadium. Hbf takes off running towards our room and suddenly, everyone starts screaming.

The guard dog, a large rottweiler, didn't like Hbf running past his territory so he takes off after him. The owner and all the massage ladies who wait outside all day start yelling, either for the dog to stop or for Hbf to stop running, I couldn't understand which. Hbf stops though, thankfully, and just as thankfully, so does the rottweiler. He was prolly within 4 feet of catching him but luckily, everyone stopped in time. Hbf continues his trek to our room more slowly, and we were able to make it to the fight on time. He maintains that he totally could have handled the dog had it gotten to him.. He would have poked him in the eyes or something. Mmm hmm..

Sooo, we go to the fight, which was awesome and very entertaining. But that's not where all the action was. The bathroom at the stadium was a shared bathroom, meaning both boys and girls used it. It's large, with prolly 7 stalls for girls and 5 urinals for the guys. I went first, and there were 2 tough guys waiting at the opening (there wasn't really a door) which I thought were the bouncers. You know, if anything sketchy went down in the bathroom between patrons, they were there to stop it. Well, I did my business and had no problems with anyone, so I was happy.

Later, Hbf went to the bathroom and came back rolling his shoulders in circles and stretching his neck side to side. I asked him if he was ok and he said 'Yeah! I actually feel amazing.' Apparently, while finishing up at the urinal, one of the bouncers came and put a warm towel on his neck. I was shocked and asked him if he turned around and punched the guy in the face. Who touches you when you are going to the bathroom? The answer should be no one. Hbf said no... he thought it was weird, but it actually felt nice. I laughed and laughed, but that wasn't the end of his bathroom experience. While he was washing his hands, the other bouncer came behind him and cracked his back a couple of different ways, along with his neck. Now, this wouldn't be weird I guess, except we were at a boxing match and he was getting this adjustment in a bathroom! AAAAAND, Hbf didn't think it was that weird! He said it was one of the best chiropractic adjustments he had gotten and he felt really really great now. I was literally speechless. Even after all this time, he still says it wasn't that weird.. *sigh*

S to the C to the U to the B to the A

I am officially a scuba diver. I can sink all the way down to 18 meters (I think?) and watch the little fishies swim in their coral houses. I was lucky enough to get a class where it was just me and the instructor, Bank (Bang? No, Bank.. I think) who is a Thai guy who had a silly british accent. Silly to me because it did not go with his face and he would say things like knickers and mawwwsk. Anyways, the first day was pretty uneventful, filled with some videos and a swimming test. On the second day, I actually got to put the gear on and go down a couple of meters. We would do drills while underwater, like "accidentally" losing my breathing apparatus so I could learn how to calmly find it again without panicking. Most of the drills had to do with what to do when something bad happens. Other than that, scuba is just breathing and idly swimming while looking at all the beautiful things around you.

On my last day, Hbf joined us for 2 boat dives off a small island near Phuket. It was really fun having him along and he got to know my limits with my instructor there.

We took a boat to a touristy island called Koh Phi Phi and decided to do a dive there. We saw lots of turtles and a shark.. It's like this whole other world that is so colorful and vibrant. I'm really happy I get to see it now.. At least once in a while. Diving can be spendy but I know we'll get a couple in before we make the trip home.

Can I just say I hate AT&T? They find every excuse to squeeze money out of you, even though they give you assurances that you won't have to pay anything.. It's lies. Anything any cell phone company ever tells anyone is a lie. I wish I could leave AT&T but I love my iPhone too much. Dang it.

A letter to my bug repellent

Dear REPEL bug repellent,

I thought you were my best friend. I thought you always had my back in times of crisis. I took you on this trip because you were the strongest bug repellent I could find and I had no doubts that you would do the one specific job you were made for. We've had some good times.. Rice patties, stone forests, bike rides and even beaches. I never forgot to put you on before I left the house and I would even reapply when I got home, in case some blood sucking mosquito followed me into the room in hopes of a delicious feast while I was sleeping. Our room constantly smelled of bug spray but none of it matters since you were doing such a good job. Hbf would cough and spit and complain how his eyes and lungs burned, but I would just point to my unblemished skin and say it was worth it. Yesterday, everything changed.

We decided to take a walk to the other side of the island and it just so happened we had to hike through what I'm pretty sure is called Mosquito City. I was confident, though. You contain 100% DEET, which I didn't even think was possible. If a mosquito wanted to come near my skin, he would surely melt on contact. When we got to Mosquito City, I was shocked to see the size of these skeeters! They were the size of large flies and had obviously eaten well. There were so many, too! We tried to keep the pace brisk, but I started feeling them getting to my skin. I looked down and there was actually one on my leg! I slapped it in anger but my anger was not at the mosquito. No.. It was at you, REPEL. 100% DEET you say? I say balderdash.

Those mosquitoes were the ultimate test, and you failed. When I saw the first mosquito get through, I panicked. But, I quickly remembered that I had brought you with me and sweet redemption could be yours! I hurredly started to reapply but you were having no effect! No effect! Finally I just started running through the forest to make it to safety, the beach. When I got there, the bites were already starting to swell and itch. The final count was 10 mosquito bites, some so big they have swelled up my whole ankle. I must say I am severely disappointed in your performance. Even as I type this I want to claw my skin off of my legs to stop the itching.

The only thing that saved me yesterday was the amazing sunset I watched while swimming in the warm ocean with my boyfriend. If not for that.. I surely would have curled into a little ball and wept.

Sincerely Dissatisfied,

Booty

I think the devil drives a bus

Ok, the bus to Phuket was maaaaybe one of the worst rides I have ever been on. We were told that it was about a 15 hour bus ride that leaves at 6:00 pm and gets there at 9:00 am the next day. Cool with me. So we show up at the our departure destination at 5:50 pm and wait. And wait. Finally a little Thai lady comes and tells us to follow her. She is in a very short skirt and gets lots of cat calls as we navigate through busy streets to the street where the bus will pick us up. 30 minutes later, we finally make it on the bus and it leaves a little before 7:00 pm. Hbf and I realize we left our water but we are told we will be stopping in a bit at a place where we can buy water. Sweet. 2 horrible movies later (blood diamond and max payne.. two feel good movies that just warm your heart), we haven't stopped and i'm considering stealing our neighbor's water bottle because I'm pretty sure I'm dying of thirst. As Hbf and I started to devise a plan, the bus finally stopped for "dinner" (it's 11:00 pm). we rush off and are able to buy bottles of water that we instantly drain. We buy 2 more for the trip.

After we get back on the bus, we decide to take some Tylenol PM to make the trip a little more comfortable. Hbf had mentioned a particularly uncomfortable overnight bus ride he had done before, where he got no sleep. Well, no problem here.. I've got pills. We take our pills and fall blissfully asleep, only to be woken up at 3:00 am. They turn on all the lights and some people start to get off. There's momentary drug-induced confusion and panic, but we realize we couldn't possibly be to Phuket yet and go back to our comas.

We are then awakened at 6:00 am and everyone is told to get off the bus. I'm so drowsy I can hardly move, but we get off the bus and we are told we are going to get on a different bus. He asks for our ticket and we give it to him. 30 minutes later, I'm a little more awake but no bus has come for us. Suddenly, the thai man who seems to be in charge notices we have no sticker that tells him where we are going. He asks us for our ticket. We tell him we already gave it to him. He says no, he doesn't have our ticket, otherwise we would have a sticker. Hbf tells him he gave the ticket to him as we got off the bus. The thai man still says no. We ask to see all the tickets, so he gets them out. We point out our ticket and he says no, that's not our ticket. He thinks that ticket came from someone else. I start yelling. I didn't want to, but it's waaaay to early to be awake and obviously we gave him the ticket. Turns out another couple had not given them their ticket and he had given them our stickers. His bad. Yes.. His very bad. 7:00 am rolls around and finally a little covered pick up truck with bench seats in the back picks us up. At first I thought we would be riding in that for the rest of the time, but he was just taking us to the next bus. He drops us off at a little cafe/warehouse so we can wait for the next bus. Hooray, more waiting.
Then, it starts POURING down rain. Luckily we were inside, but the cockroaches wanted to be inside too. They start streaming in to the place and I can't help but yelling and pulling my feet up so they don't touch me. Finally our bus comes and we have to wade out in ankle deep puddles to get on the bus. Good times. By this time it's like 7:30 am and we are thinking we will get to Phuket by 9:00 am. At 2 pm, we finally made it to the Phuket town, but we still needed to go to the beach. That took time.. 2 hours. At 4, we found a place. Thank goodness this place is a little slice of heaven because I wouldn't accept anything less.

The ocean is warm and crystal clear and the beaches are clean and full or soft, white sand. The next day I started my scuba certification and finished today. More on that later. I'm hoping tomorrow I can enjoy the beach and sun.

Flesh eating fish

I have been shopping like a mad woman. I usually hate shopping but when the mood strikes, it has a hold on me until i get my fill. Luckily, I am on Khao San Road in Bangkok, where everything is like a dollar. I sold my coat for 3 dollars to get rid of some weight in my bag and to make room for my new wardrobe. I know some of you are balking at the piddly 3 dollars I got. But, you have to remember that I only bought it for about 16 bucks, and the chances I'll need it in the trip are slim to none. So, I was either gonna give it to some bum, or sell it for 3 dollars. With my money from the coat and a little extra, I bought 2 tank tops and a skirt. I think it was a fair deal.

They have everything here on Khao San Road, and did I mention it's cheap? Street food is less than a dollar and a nice meal at a restaurant isn't much more. I have actually taken to the spring rolls they sell on the street. I'm told you can find them anywhere, so that is good news for me. massages are less than 6 bucks for an hour and pedicures are like 3 bucks. This is my kind of place!

Hbf and I found a spa that had those "fish" foot massages, aka, the fish eat the dead skin off your feet. Yum. We couldn't resist though! We put our feet in the tank and the fish flocked to eat our toes. At first we were both screaming because it's like 100 itty bitty pieces of sand paper brushing against your heels, toes, ankles and even the bottoms of your feet. Mine are suuuuper sensitive and it took all the strength I had to keep my feet in. I was getting goosebumps from the sheer effort of not running away. After awhile though, you get used to the sensation and it doesn't tickle as much. Hbf has nasty, dry feet so of course he had a whole school of fish around him. You could barely see where his feet were in the beginning. We stayed in about 20 minutes and my feet felt deliciously soft and refreshed. Hbf even commented that his feet felt a lot smoother and softer. Success! It was definitely a fun and unique experience for both of us.

Tonight we are headed to Phuket. It's on the west coast of Thailand and has better weather right now than the east coast. We will prolly be spending at least a week around that area so maybe I can get a tan! Stop laughing.

I guess that's what I get for gambling

We took Hong Kong by storm! And by that I mean Hbf got food poisoning and puked in the train sink (the bathrooms were locked), the train station and our room in Hong Kong. He rallied the next day though and we were able to make it to Hong Kong Island for some spectacular views and a little shopping. We even went to a movie, Looking for Eric. Pretty entertaining, and it was in English! Hallelujah!

El Dub had asked us to shop around for an awesome Rolex (by awesome I mean fake), so we started to do our research. We walked into a real Rolex store and instantly I felt out of place. The worker bees were wearing suits and I was wearing my Utah State basketball shorts and a camouflage hat that has a skull on it. But, we had a mission. We browsed around, asking questions like, "how many carats are these diamonds?" and "does this watch come in rose gold?". I even got them to take 2 out of the glass case so I could examine them up close. It turns out they were each worth $25,000. Whoa. I actually held $50,000 in my hand. Anyways, we tried to memorize the markings and engravings so we could get the best for El Dub. Our research paid off and we got him a really nice one with diamonds. It looks real! I swear!

After Hong Kong, we took a turbo jet to Macau, the Las Vegas of the East. Pfffft. No. Macau has casinos, yes. But the spirit of Las Vegas is missing. Where are all the people in the streets, drinking? Where are all the flashing lights so bright they give you a seizure? The casinos are all spread out, and separated on different floors. They were also very subdued and the slot machines were so quiet that I could hardly hear when I won money. A little disappointing. We had a hard time finding a craps table and when we did, I lost all my money in about 10 minutes. Boo. Ok maybe my impression of Macau was tainted by my gambling experience, but there is definitely something lacking in Macau and I don't think it can be compared to Las Vegas at all. 'Nough said.

We've left China now and we are in Bangkok. My first impression is.. um.. holy crap. This place is crazy. But, everything is cheap and we are loading up on supplies before heading to the coast so I can start my SCUBA certification. I even tried PadThai off the street and I haven't died yet. It was actually pretty good. I am also finding english is pretty well known around here, at least in Bangkok. It's definitely a nice change from no one understanding what you are trying to say. So far, so good.

End of the first quarter

Tomorrow marks 45 days since we left. If we stay for as long as we planned, that means we are 25% done with the trip. Blows my MIND! Time flies when you are having fun I guess. We're just about finished with China.. Just 2 more stops: Hong Kong and Macau. Macau is the Las Vegas of China, which I am really excited about. We are only staying 1 night, so I don't think I'll have enough time to gamble all of our money away. Maybe just half of it (OR, maybe I'll double our money). I am definitely looking forward to the next leg of the trip. We are heading to Thailand so I can get SCUBA certified as cheaply as possible. From there, I think we will make our way to Laos, Cambodia and Vietnam. That's the plan as of today, at least, but it may change tomorrow.

We hit up an amusement park yesterday and I have to say, I do like the way China does rides. There were some pretty crazy roller coasters as well as weird rides that would make even the strongest stomach a lil queazy (ask Hbf.. haha). One ride held us upside down for like 10 seconds and then twirled us around and then just stopped. We weren't sure what was going to happen until we were screaming and flipping through the air (ok, maybe I was the only one screaming). There was a roller coaster that we went on at least 4 times and it made me see stars every single time from the first giant drop that went straight down. Those are my kind of rides.. The ones where you may just black out. Exciting :D We were supposed to go to a water park as well, but it was closed. I hid my tears well and we had a wonderful day at the amusement park. The little chinese (cantonese?) children loved us and we were constantly being barraged by Hello! Hellllloooo! We even saw a magic show, a bizarre 4-D animated movie (um, aliens try to kill all the dinosaurs but the fire breathing dragon saves the day and takes down the mothership. Some dinosaurs end up living) and an action show called danger island. Good stuff. The funny thing was, most of the actors in the show were white. They had a taped dialogue so they weren't really speaking Chinese, they just pretended to. It seemed like a pretty good gig to me and the Chinese people seemed to love it. I wonder how much they get paid.. Maybe that can be my next job.

Number 1 I can understand.. But Number 2?

So. I got food poisoning. Oh the humanity! After about 2 days, I had my first (pseudo) meal of broth and toast. I fought to keep it down. Lemme just say, for the record, that I hate barfing. It's just so funny that Hbf eats things like river snails and beer fish, but I'm the one who gets sick off of porridge and toast. The irony is so thick it chokes me (and makes me puke). Alright, enough of that talk.. Let me transition to something a bit different: Poop. Reader discretion is advised.. If you can't handle poo talk, maybe you should skip this entry. But it's not my poo I'm going to talk about, so don't worry. I saw the most disturbing thing the other day.. I think it was in Dali. Before I describe what I saw, let me give a little back story.

Before we even came to China, a friend who had already visited told us a vivid story in which the children of China don't wear diapers. They have slits in their pants and basically pop a squat (or have a parent holding them over a garbage can/grass patch/whatever) wherever they are at the moment. I couldn't believe this story. No diapers! I scoffed. But lo and behold, those Chinese children had slits in their pants and there were no diapers to be seen. Hbf and I have seen children going pee in the streets numerous times, and we leaughed and laughed. We even sought to take a picture of the event because we didn't think people back home would believe it. But this all changed one day when we were walking to a restaurant in Dali. Dali has canals running through the streets and you can see people washing dishes and vegetables in the canal. That's probably where they get their running water from. As we walked, I spotted a little girl, perhaps 4 years old (old enough to know better) assuming the position over the canal. I started to point her out to Hbf, when I realized she was going Number 2! In the street! a BUSY street! I just couldn't believe it.. She was waaaay too old and she was doing it in the canal! My mind flashed back to the woman washing her vegetables.. Suddenly, it doesn't surprise me at all that I got food poisoning.

Ok poo time over. I have mosquito bites on the tops of both my feet, which has really hindered my shoe wearing abilities. I walked up moon hill in bare feet, which is like a zillion stairs, but worth the climb. We also went to the mud caves yesterday and I don't think I have ever been that dirty in my life. Check out the pictures on Flickr :) We are staying in Yangshuo a couple of more days in order to really pack everything in we can.

Food for thought

I've been gone for a month now. Some people didn't think I would make it this long (I'm looking at you, El Dub). The most worrisome part of this whole trip has been the food issue. I'm what some call a 'picky' eater. I've been this way since I was able to communicate my opinions to my parents and I can't even remember the last time I had milk in my cereal (makes it soggy.. and sogginess is my mortal enemy). How have I survived without my daily bagels with cream cheese and cereal? In a 6 month period, I'd prolly have chinese food maybe 3 times and now I'm expected to eat it 3 times a day. Um.. no. I thought I would be able to get by eating rice and in Beijing, I learned that I don't really have much of a tolerance for tasteless rice. I also learned that I get cranky when I'm not fed what I want (Hbf learned too) and that basically I'm a slave to my cravings. This was not good news. In Beijing I subsisted on cookies, mostly. Delicious butter cookies, but cookies nonetheless. There would be an occasional meal that I could pick at some noodles, but nothing was really to my liking. The situation was worse than I thought.

Once we got out of Beijing and into the smaller, touristy areas, something wonderful happened. Cafes offered western food. And not just western food, western BREAKFAST food. Now, breakfast happens to be my favorite meal of the day and I often have it for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I was delighted by what I found in every little town we went to, of course, but let me make myself clear. The food isn't up to par with a delicious breakfast restaurant in the states, but it is always edible to me. There were things about the food that I had to get used to..

1. The only way they know how to cook eggs is to fry them. If you say scrambled, they nod their heads like they understand but here comes the egg, fried. I've acquired a taste for fried eggs now.. And if you put them on toast, they are very tastey.

2. No syrup. Sad, sad, sad.. I miss syrup terribly. They give you honey or sugar, but it is really not the same at all. I've learned to cope, of course, and maybe when I get back I won't even like syrup. Right now though, I am mourning the loss of my precious syrup.

3. If they say pancake, beware. A pancake can be anything.. And it is rarely what you think it is.

Back in the states, I would maybe have eggs once every 2 weeks. Now I eat eggs daily, sometimes more than once. I've also taken a liking to oatmeal, which I would never touch back home. Hbf would always try to get me to eat oatmeal when we went camping, but I would refuse. The stuff was repulsive and I always had my bagels and cream cheese that I loved. In China, I can't get enough oatmeal! They call it porridge, and it usually comes with fruit. I'll prolly never touch it once I get back, but right now it tastes soooo good (see how my standards have lowered?). I also drink hot chocolate like my life depnds on it. I can't get enough of the stuff.

Anyways, I hope this answered some of your questions about how I am staying alive over here in China. I must go to search out some porridge. P.S. The Stone Forest was awesome. :)

Hiking is like walking, except when it's like going up 10,000 stairs

We hiked Tiger Leaping Gorge yesterday and the day before. Spoiler alert: I didn't see any tigers leaping anywhere. However, I did see amazing scenery along with some goats (sadly, they didn't leap either). The gorge is beautiful, complete with bamboo forests, waterfalls and a path right on the edge of a cliff. Everybody had warned us about a certain part of the trek called the 28 bends which consisted of switchback turns going straight up. I dreaded that part of course, but we passed it without any problems, chatting the whole way up about things we had seen here in China (a man with a squirrel on a leash. True story).

After a wonderful evening at the Tea Horse Guest House, we set about our second day of hiking, which had the best scenery as the views weren't obstructed by so much foliage. We could see straight down to the (unfortuantely) brown water very far below. I was done hiking about noon, but alas, we didn't finish until 3:30. The saddest part was that the most intense and physically challenging part of the hike was the last 2 hours. I think Hbf couldn't help but notice my discontentment those last hours.. But let me back up. We came to the official end at noon. I was stoked! We had done it! And it wasn't even that hard! Hooooold up there Booty, we aren't done yet. You can actually hike down to the water, which is a mile straight down. With the utter delight that lit up Hbf's eyes, I couldn't say no. Down, down we go, with A LOT of Chinese tourists.. We walk down for more than an hour and we finally reach the (disturbingly) brown river with very large rapids. While I am walking down, I am hoping there is some sort of elevator up.. There's not. We decide to go up another way, where there aren't as many tourists. This way entails ladders, so I'm thinking we just climb a ladder all the way up. I think something was lost in translation because there are only 2 ladders, and they only took us up about 50 feet. The rest of the way was filled with incredibly steep steps. Good times! There were times I didn't think I was going to make it.. I think I told Hbf to go on without me and he actually started to, but then I hastily yelled that I wasn't serious and please carry me. He wouldn't. Moral of the story is: the 28 bends are nothing compared to going down to the water and coming back up. Hikers be warned!

I'm alive though, and after thinking about it, that hike was nothing compared to Yosemite's Half Dome (HELL Dome I lovingly like to refer to it). We are back in Lijiang, which is prolly my favorite place in China so far. I have actually found some very delicious food, western style, of course. The rooms here are cheap and nice and have a real toilet! It's kind of sad to think that my criteria for a nice room is that it has a toilet, but that is definitely what it has come to.

If it weren't 20 lbs, I'd carry it everywhere

Dry your tears people, I'm back. Sickness got me when we were in Chengdu, but it was a nice enough place to recover from my sick bed. It even had a giant statue of Mao giving the Heil Hitler salute which cheered me up a bit. Nothing like commy sentiment to raise the spirits. I was also swept up in PANDA-mania! Those guys are just freakin adorable and if Hbf weren't so tight with the cash, I would have held one. The adult pandas seriously look like guys in panda costumes eating bamboo. They've got the pseudo thumb which makes the costume theory even more plausible. It was a lovely day, filled with my favorite things: animals.

We flew to Lijiang and everything went smoothly until we picked up our luggage. Or rather, Hbf's luggage. Mine didn't arrive. Can you say instant puddle of tears? Let's see.. no one speaks english and everything that I have for the next 6 months of traveling is missing. When Hbf tried to talk to me about logistics (what was irreplaceable, what I could buy again), I lost it. The thought of losing everything just like that was too much to bear at 9 in the morning and I withdrew to a chair in tears and alone with my miserable thoughts. I'm so thankful Hbf held it together and took care of everything. His patient way with the Chinese people got our message across, and we were able to find someone in town who spoke both very good english and mandarin to help us even more. Moral of the story: I got my bag back, miraculously.

Apparently, we are celebrities here in the back country of China. People come up to us and want their picture taken with us. I'm not quite sure if they really think we are famous or if they've never seen a white person before. And I'm prolly like the whitest white person they have ever seen, since they don't let pasty people on TV. Anyways, it's nice to be adored for no apparent reason at all and they are all so grateful once they have their snapshot. There is also a lot of staring from everyone, maybe because we are just so beautiful, or maybe because we are just so white. Since I don't speak mandarin, I'll prolly never know.

We are leaving for a 3 day trek through Tiger Leaping Gorge the day after tomorrow. I think I am going to wish that I had a horse to carry me.

A sack of wood chips and a second story bathroom

We went on a 3 day horse trek to a place called Ice Mountain. The scenery was amazing and riding a horse seemed waaaay better than walking up the mountain. Basically all we had to do was stay on the horse and our guides did the rest. That proved difficult enough sometimes, as the trail was often muddy and we crossed a river about 20 times. However, no one fell off and apart from just generally freezing our butts off, there were no injuries either. Supposedly during the summer time, people usually stay in tents. We were fortunate enough to get to stay in a Tibetan home in a small village about 3 hours from Ice Mountain. We were soooo thankful that we would be out of the cold that we really didn't expect much in the way of beds. We figured we would be sleeping on the floor, which was fine with us since it was shielded from the wind. Imagine our surprise and utter delight when they showed us to our beds! We couldn't believe it! I was practically jumping for joy because I wouldn't have to sleep on the ground. We started to get into our beds, and that's when we noticed some interesting details about our bedding...

Hbf's bed was actually a piece of plywood with a layer of carpet on it. I fared a little better, as mine had a 1 inch mattress on the plywood. My bedding consisted of a light sleeping bag (Hbf wasn't lucky enough to get one), a Tibetan coat (think long, heavy jacket) and the canvas bags that doubled as saddle bags on our ride (read: it wreaked like horse). My pillow was a crumpled up piece of canvas. Funny thing is, my bed was voted the best. Hbf also had the same bedding as me minus the sleeping bag, but his pillow was a sack of wood chips. The English guy with us didn't even get a pillow. But hey, the beds were warm, and I even had a kitty curl up with me through out the night to keep me extra cozy.

I figured the house didn't have a regular toilet, so I tried not to think about what I was going to have to do to relieve myself. However, I was the first who had to go and the boys made me ask where the bathroom was. The host pointed to a door, and I bravely walked in, expecting the worst (a pile of waste maybe?) The bathroom was an enclosed deck on the second floor and in the middle of the deck, there was a hole cut out. And that was the bathroom. I flashed my light down the hole and sure enough, it went straight down to the yard with no pipe or chute to guide it to a destination. It was just a hole. It was actually one of the nicer squat toilets because the products were so far away (2 stories below) and there was no smell. I was quite happy with it until the next morning when I saw people had missed the hole. There was no light in the bathroom so I think they had difficulty with their aim in the dark.

All in all, it was a good trip. The last day was quite rough on me but I survived. Maybe someday I'll even be able to talk about it.. We're off to Chengdu at the crack of dawn tomorrow to see some pandas. Hooray!

Does sunblock come in soap?

We conquered The Jiuz today. Jiuzhaigou is known as China's Yosemite, and it lived up to its name. The place was just amazing, with the clearest water I have ever seen. The lakes had every shade of blue and green in them and would not have been out of place in the Caribbean. The Juiz is long though, about 20 miles. We didn't walk all of it, but we prolly walked about 15 miles. I have my withered up feet to prove it.

We've started the malaria pills since we are moving on to more rural areas. The pills are an antibiotic, and they have the following side effects: skin is more sensitive to sunlight, yeast infections, may make birth control ineffective, oh aaaaaand, it may give you nightmares. The side effect I'm mainly concerned about is nightmares, so we have started taking them with breakfast in hopes that no scary monsters will chase us 16 hours later. I have my share of night terrors without the pills, but so far so good. As some of you may know, I am very very white. Some call it pale, I call it pure. Anyways, I was out in the clouded sun for not even 5 minutes yesterday and lo and behold! My cheeks are aflame come night time. I got sunburned in like 2 minutes because of these pills. Ok I know some of you aren't very surprised, but I am! And I'm pissed! I'm going to have to bathe in 50 spf every day before I can step into sunlight. Maybe I should become a vampire. But I'll leave that career option open until I get back from this trip.

It's been 10 days now. What ever family member had 10 days in the 'How long will Booty last' pool loses! I'm not coming home quite yet and I just had a delicious dinner of toast, eggs and hot chocolate. I can find beige things to eat everywhere! My stomach may be a mess right now, but it will even out. I bought some medicine today and communicating with the pharmicist was a bit rough. I'm either supposed to take 1 pill at 6 in the morning, or 6 pills through out the day. I hope I choose the right one..

We're off to Songpan tomorrow for a horseback riding trek. I know my sister would love this and I wish she could be here! Apparently the guides set up camp for you and cook 3 meals a day. Basically all we have to do is stay on the horse and we are golden. I can't vouch for Hbf but I'm pretty sure I can handle that. I'll make sure to get pictures when he falls off. Or when I throw things at him to startle his horse and then he falls off. ;) I kid.

And I thought Hbf could be disgusting..

Before I begin my shining reviews of all the things I've seen and places we've been, I need to take a turn to Negative Town for just a minute. There are some things that have just been bothering me and Hbf tunes me out when I start talking about them. Debby Downer, he calls me. And I say Hey Positive Pete, someone needs to keep us real. My first gripe is with the beds. They are sooooo hard! It's like sleeping on pavement with a sheet laid down on it. There's no way to sleep on your side unless you want hip dysplasia in 2 days. Good thing they have massages for cheap here or else I think I would be stiff and sore until we get to Vietnam. The second problem I have is with the Chinese people and their seemingly never ending need to hock loogies and shoot snot rockets WHEREVER they are. Outside, in a restaurant, on a train! There's no place where you won't hear or see someone spitting, blowing, or coughing whatever the hell they have in their throats up. If I ever get hungry, I only have to wait about 2 minutes and someone will begin hacking up a lung right next to me. Instant appetite suppressant. I guess the government is trying to discourage the behavior, which scares me. What would it be like if they weren't discouraging it? I shudder to think. And throw up in my mouth a little bit. That being said, there is one more thing that disgusts me more than the loogies. I have what some would consider a freakishly good sense of smell. For better or worse, I can smell almost everything, and do, especially before eating it. Walking around China, especially Datong, I have smelled the worst possible smells ever known to mankind. Now, I know my little brother is thinking, no way! We once smelled this toilet in Spain that was really bad. We crawled around on the floor gagging and coughing, trying to spit out any remnants . But to him I say, um yeah.. this is like a Billion times worse. That's a capital B. At first Hbf didn't notice it, which proved my theory that he had no sense of smell. I thought for sure no person on earth could ignore these smells. Each time I got a whiff, I wanted to throw up, then curl up in a little ball and die. But then the next second it would be gone and I would decide that I want to live after all. In Datong though, Hbf started to notice the smells. We went on a walk through the town, only to find out we were on the foulest smelling street in the city. I had my nose in my shirt, breathing through my mouth and I could even taste it. Luckily I just ate or I don't think I could even be writing about this stuff. I'm not sure what the hell those smells are, but it may be a mix of dead animals, poop and rotting food. That's just a guess though. Apparently the Chinese have no sense of smell because no one notices. I didn't see anyone gagging or covering their noses like we were.. These smells must have singed off their nose hairs and destroyed their odor sensors by the time they were toddlers. Alright, enough of my detour. I've got that out of my system and I am back on track. We are in Xi'an now and so far, so good. Tomorrow we see the terracotta warriors and we will also be enjoying some hot springs. I'm hoping there is a no spitting sign in the pools..

Where are all the big dogs?

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.. There were a lot of firsts yesterday. Don't fall out of your chair, but yesterday I ate my first authentic Chinese meal... wait for it.. with Chopsticks! I actually got some in my mouth too! We were on a tour at the Great Wall and they fed us this extravagant lunch with 9 different dishes and I actually liked 4 out of the 9. I couldn't get any of the rice in my mouth with the chopsticks, so I ended up using my soup spoon to shovel it in. However, I ate everything else with chopsticks although my form fell apart early. I adapted well though, and I give myself 4 out of 5 stars for effort. I lost a star for using the soup spoon for something other than soup. Another 1st came about 12 hours later and I lost the bet as to who would get sick first. They call it Montezuma's Revenge in Mexico.. I guess here it would be called Mao's Revenge.
We bought our first souvenirs yesterday. Or rather, I begged hbf to buy me an I <3 Beijing shirt and a watch that has Mao waving on the face, and he conceded. It wasn't easy, but I'm not one to give up when it comes to hbf buying me things, ESPECIALLY when it's a watch that has Mao waving to me whenever I look at the time. The I <3 Beijing shirt was the only shirt I found with Chinese characters on it so I just had to have it.
Sunday morning we went to a park where tons of people gathered to sing, dance, and squat thrust together (no joke). It was like walking into the book 1984, except everyone had a smile on their face and seemed to enjoy the camaraderie. Since they were all speaking mandarin, I couldn't distinguish if they were actually talking in Newspeak, but it wouldn't surprise me.. Actually, that park was such a pleasure to be in. Happy noises filled the atmosphere and all the dancers and singers looked like they truly enjoyed their craft. But of course, Big Brother is always watching.. Right?
We are leaving Beijing today for the west and hopefully it will be less expensive. A cool wind has blown the smog away for the last couple of days so we were able to actually see the sun! We didn't think it would happen, but apparently the wind gods had mercy and did us a favor. It really is a beautiful city even though you can't see 100 yards in front of you. I have noticed an alarming trend though. There are only small dogs here in Beijing. I have seen probably 20 dogs, and none of them have been bigger than a miniature poodle. Is that because the small ones have no delicious meat on their body? They are all tendon and bone and not worth the effort to cook, apparently. I had read that over 120 restaurants took dog off the menu for the Olympics, but we couldn't find out whether they had put it back on the menu yet. I suppose they have.. I should probably be memorizing the most important sentence in our phrase book: I don't eat dog.

Don't Get Crabs*

*Parting words from my mom on my first phone call to the rents from Beijing. Wise words from a wise lady, indeed. I can definitely say with all honesty I will do my best not to get crabs. But things happen, ya know?

We made it to Beijing unscathed. I thought for sure there would be some sort of hitch in our travel but it went very smoothly. I popped my pills and slept blissfully through the flight, finally waking up to the rich aroma of a Cup o' Noodle with chopsticks shoved in it. Apparently this is what passes for a hot meal on Air Canada, but I can't complain. Who doesn't love Cup o' Noodle? If it's beige, I'm into it. As far as meals go, I haven't had the best luck. The first night I had butter cookies and jerky (Thank you lord for hbf bringing the jerky!). Yesterday, meals consisted of sweet rolls, rice, minestrone soup (spicy tomato water?) and bread. I am still alive and I still have energy so I am calling that a success.

Beijing is a hot mess of buildings, people, cars and bikes. We decided we wanted to flirt with death so we rented bicycles and rode all around the city yesterday. I think my mouth was gaping open 95% of the time. It is just so different from anything I have ever seen before. There is old world, chinese architecture side by side high rise buildings. There are motorcycles in the bike lanes, along with scooters, rickshaws, and people walking. Luckily all the bikes come with an annoying bell so you can incessantly alert people to your approach. Not that they move out of the way or even look back, but if they get in your way, you don't have to feel bad because you rang your bell.

We toured the Forbidden City yesterday, which was truly amazing. It's HUGE! I kind of want my house to look like the Hall of Supreme Harmony. There were rich greens and vivid blues, along with gold dragons painted everywhere. If it's good enough for some emperors, it's good enough for the princess. We walked all over the Forbidden City, and hbf didn't need to drag me around once. It's early though.

So, just a side note. Both facebook and my blog site are blocked by China. No facebook you say?! I don't want to live!! What will I do without Mafia Wars?! But then I remembered that I'm traveling around SE Asia for the next 6 months and I came down off the ledge. I am emailing my blog entries to a certain Venezuelan yogini and she will be posting them for me. Thanks a bunch, my dear! I hope to be back on facebook and posting my own blog entries when we get to Vietnam, but that isn't for awhile.

Packing, Unpacking and Packing Again

It's the calm before the storm. Tomorrow morning is the beginning of possibly the greatest adventure in my life, but I'm hoping there will be more opportunities like this in the future. Hbf finally made it to Oregon, sans his beautiful dark curls, but his hair was getting so long that my mom thought he looked like a terrorist. I guess it was best he cut them off because I don't think he is a fan of cavity searches (I think?).

I've gotten a lot of the same questions while seeing friends and family in the past couple of days. Am I nervous? No, I don't think so. I mean, my insides are constantly quivering with anticipation and there's always a lump in my throat. But nervous? No. Way. What am I going to eat? Well, I'm not sure. Hbf likes to laughingly tell me I'll eventually eat dog, but then I slap him in the face and he stops laughing. I think I'll eat a lot of rice. I'll also search out any kind of bread I can find. But, there is a slight chance I'll open my mind (and mouth) and taste something different. It really depends on how hungry I get and how desperate I am. Never say never, I suppose, but I really want to say I'll never eat bugs, dogs or innards of any kind. I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. And finally, what is our first destination? Beijing! The Forbidden City, the Great Wall, Beijing has it all.

The rest of the day will be filled with packing, my least favorite thing to do. There's something about trying to choose the 4 shirts I will live in for the next 6 months that makes me want to take a nap. Our plane leaves at 7 AM and I don't really think I will get much sleep tonight. My mind doesn't like to quiet down when there is something epic on the horizon. Don't worry though! I have pills to force sleep on the plane. Everybody wins!

Mindful Preparation

Eight and a half more days of work. 43 and a half more days until we leave. AAAHHHHHH There's so much to do! Hi, my name is Booty and I'm a list maker. {Hi Booty} I have a list in the family room and a list in the bedroom. I now have a list that goes with me everywhere and it's three pages long. I even made a list for hbf of things he is responsible for. He just laughs and shakes his head at my lists, but I love them! They bring order to the chaos that is in my mind and it gives me a small sense of accomplishment to take my pen and violently cross off the things that are done. [Cancel the cable] Hbf claims that 90% of my To Do's could go undone and I would be perfectly fine. I maintain that if 90% of my tasks went unfinished my head would explode. [Put Law & Order episodes on my iPod] I prepare now so I can be at ease when we travel. I am what you would call 'worry wart' (thank you mother) and I dwell on every single itty bitty detail until I drive myself and everyone around me crazy. [Find my camera] So, good thing work is uber slow and I have enough time to stew about everything I need to get done. Otherwise, I don't think I would sleep for fear of not completing my lists on time! [Book a hotel in Beijing]

With all this list making, I haven't had time to think about the actual trip. [Learn how to use chopsticks] Maybe my lists are a coping mechanism because I would poop my pants if I started to dwell on the fact that I may have chronic diarrhea for the next 6 months. [Put together a 1st aid kit] Also, I probably wouldn't get much done if I were fantasizing about all the perfect beaches I was going to lay on. My lists keep me focused, and they keep me from freaking out. [Make copies of our passports]

Enough about lists! Hbf wanted me to mention our other blog that will actually tell about the places we have been and what we have done. the url is www.mytb.org/gabanie [Register trip with the US consulate] That blog will tell about our adventures: this is what we did and this is where we have been. [Get Rxs filled] My blog will kind of be the same thing, but written with my slant on it (the princess slant) and will probably focus on my inability to try new foods or be OK with soggy things on my palette.

The world calls this neophobia and it generally only applies to children, but I say I have an over developed sense of taste. I really can't believe anyone would eat a cooked carrot if they were actually tasting and feeling what I taste and feel when I eat one. I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. [Change my address] Texture is even more important than taste. I love cereal way more than the average person. It's one of my food groups (my food groups are: bread, bagels, cereal, milk, eggos and any other breakfast food). However, if you pour milk on the cereal, I won't touch it. The milk makes the cereal soggy, and sogginess is my sworn enemy. [Print out travel insurance policy] There are few things more unpleasant to me than eating something soggy (no, that is not a challenge). Soooo, needless to say I have a few worries about finding things to eat when I am over in Asia. I guess it could mean I'll be on the best weight loss diet for the next 6 months.

And So It Begins..

Ok so we haven't left yet for the big trip, but I wanted to introduce myself for those readers who don't really know me. I'm a female in my mid-twenties and I am already tired of my 9-5 (more like 9-4:25 but who's counting?) 'engineering' job. My hot boyfriend (hbf from now on) and I have decided to throw caution to the wind, along with all responsibility and probably basic hygiene to embark on a once (hopefully more) in a life time adventure on the other side of the world. We've been saving for the last year or so and once we get to our destination, we figure we can last about 6 months with our money. The itinerary includes: China, Vietnam, Cambodia, Laos, Thailand, Taiwan, Malaysia, Indonesia, Philippines, New Zealand and possibly Australia. D-Day is September 17th and it is rapidly approaching. Tomorrow marks T-50 days until I leave everything I have ever known.

Some people may see this itinerary and ask why? Or, what the hell are you thinking?? Or, how are you going to survive without bagels? But, I see this itinerary and ask why not? Friendly people, radically different cultures, pristine beaches, low cost food as well as lodging. I admit there will be an adjustment period which will probably (definitely) involve tears, fits a 2 year old would be jealous of, hunger and more tears, but this too will pass. I have faith that my adventurous spirit will propel me onward through these next 6 months. That, and the fact that hbf will drag me around because his energy knows no bounds. He will have to drag me though since I will be so emaciated from lack of food I won't have the strength to walk anymore.

All that being said, I am so freaking excited I can hardly stand it. This trip is something that I never really thought about doing until hbf came along, but I'm so glad we are making it happen. I think it's gonna change my life in ways I can't fathom and challenge me mentally through out the whole trip. This is good though, since I have almost gone retarded working at my current job. I need some sort of mental stimulation stat! And this is just what the doctor ordered. If you have any questions, post them in the comments section and I will be sure to answer them.